City of Bones by Cassandra Clare

Both Evermore and City of Bones were ridiculously derivative in nature. The difference is that Evermore pretended to be Twilight, while City of Bones pretended not to be Harry Potter. Both failed.

For sake of length, I'll only address its derivative nature, leaving further critique and criticism for later.

I will start by acknowledging that many of these similarities between Harry Potter and City of Bones are quite petty. Similarities like this exist, even in real life, let alone in fiction of the same or related genre, as archetypes make a genre familiar and provide a framework for creative expansion. Also, all authors write using a collage consisting of their life experiences, other works they have read, and their purely creative power. It’s natural to have crossover. Also, let’s not forget the homage. Some similarities may be the result of one author purposefully referring to a beloved work. I say all this so that you know I am not being unduly harsh.

The sheer number of coincidences led me to believe that Clare’s work was the result of too much Harry Potter, like all she had done since 1997 is read and reread that series. Thus her writer’s collage was one-third that of Joann Rowling. I was not surprised to learn that she had her start writing Harry Potter fan fiction. Admittedly, there are also elements of Twilight, Star Wars, and Lord of the Rings.

Let’s start with the most salient parallel: the villain and underlying conflict. In City of Bones, Valentine Morgenstern is widely assumed to be dead before the start of the book. As the story progresses, we learn that he is in fact at large and gathering power.  He was responsible for a great amount of chaos and slaughter about fifteen years prior. He had started a group called the Circle, whose goal it was to rid the Shadowhunters (the magic-wielding humans) of impurity and to purify the human race. This was said to be especially popular with the older houses, who viewed the Clave (ruling body of magic-wielding humans) as being overly permissive of magic non-humans and half-breeds.

Perhaps I misjudge Harry Potter’s familiarity, but I will refrain from expounding on Voldemort’s ambition, his Deatheaters, and the mistaken assumption of his death years before action in the book takes place.  Instead, I will emphasize that the major conflict of the book, the plot device around which the rest of the story revolves, is the same in both books: the attempted return to power of a fascist wizard bent on domination through blood purity, with the aid of his secret cult of followers. Those in the Circle don’t have Dark Marks, but they do have rings that can be twisted to send messages.

It’s not as bad as Christopher Paolini’s blatant retelling of Star Wars in his book Eragon, but the copy is unmistakable. Clare fleshed out the story to make it her own, but the bones are stolen from J.K. Rowling.

The other similarities are not as big, but this one is so huge that there really don’t have to be more. In fact, there shouldn’t be more, but there are.

There are small details:

• birds that carry messages between magical parties
• the name for non-magical humans (Mundanes/Muggles)
•  flying motorcycles
• enchanting buildings or even entire countries to repel non-magical people

There are entire characters:

• the parents’ best friend who is a werewolf (Lucian/Lupin)
• the coward who betrays both sides (Hodge/Wormtail)
• the old family whose wealth and connections enable them to escape the major repercussions of the villain’s fall from grace and who pass down their prejudices to their children (Lightwoods/Malfoys)
• the redheaded mother who is a victim of the V-named villain (Jocelyn/Lily)

There are even several more plot devices:

• the protagonist’s scar, from the villain and a telltale sign of the protagonist’s tie to the conflict
• the protagonist growing up in a house where the existence of magic is vehemently denied with the hopes of stamping out any inclinations toward such
• V-named villain’s youth spent at school, using his charisma to train and to recruit the underdogs to his cause
• uniting of three items (the Mortal Instruments/Deathly Hallows) to give the holder power. Incidentally, the three items are similar in purpose if not nature:
• one that could be used to make the villain his own army (the Mortal Cup for creating Shadowhunters/Resurrection Stone which Grindlewald hoped to use for an army of inferi)
• the second of a much more obvious aggressive nature (the Mortal Sword/the Elder Wand); 
• and the third with protective powers and strange ways of manipulating sight (the mirror Lake Lyn/Cloak of Invisibility). This last one is a stretch, I’ll grant, but not so much so that I am willing to give it up…like jeans one size too small.

Now, lest you think that her entire story is stolen from Harry Potter, I have a list of comparisons with other works of fiction.

Cassandra Clare claims to be “inspired by” the works of Philip Reeve, and maybe what she does is to pay him homage, but if so, then she is paying him from his own wallet. She named two of her trilogies after his books, Mortal Engines and Infernal Devices, the second of which she didn’t bother changing at all. Also, Mortal Engines features a character named Valentine who is the father of one of the main characters.

Because, yep, true to cliché, Valentine turns out to be the protagonists’ father.

The early foreshadowing was a bit obvious, but the super-awkwardly placed references to Princess Leia and the Millennium Falcon it later chapters clinched it. When Clary, the female protagonist, freaks out about the big paternity reveal, I was a little underwhelmed. To give Clare credit, however, the scene in which Clary’s love interest finds out that Valentine is also his father was remarkably well played. Still too heavy handed on the foreshadowing, but the scene played out nicely. Also, Clare is one of the few to take that Star Wars allusion to its full measure. A lot of fictional characters get told that daddy’s actually the evil villain, but few get to enjoy the more nuanced Darth Vader moment, that of the big fraternity reveal.

Now, regarding the characters. Clare sticks to the tried-and-true formula of paranormal teen romance (PTR). While she may not have stolen any of these characters from any one book, I will use Twilight, which does a surprisingly good job with the archetypes for its genre. (Others have said that Clare ripped off Joss Whedon’s Buffy the Vampire Slayer.) I won’t go into too much criticism here, because my point is that Clare lacks originality. Her lapses in talent are a matter for later posts.

The archetypes:

• The Uninitiated Heroine: fantasy writers often use the initiation of a new member to justify exposition. In PTR, this is usually a female, because it plays into the misogynistic expectation of a stronger, more powerful male love interest. (Clary/Bella)
• The Enigmatic Love Interest: as stated above, he must be stronger and more powerful, but he is also unnecessarily moody with tendencies toward violence and anger. (Jayce/Edward)
• The Unfailing Admirer: a loyal best friend harboring unrequited love for the heroine. He is representative of her life before initiation and is relatively powerless. If the book is part of a series, he may later gain supernatural power to further complicate the love triangle. (Simon/Jacob)
• The Beautiful Mean Girl: She is already initiated and resents the intrusion of the heroine, whom she demeans and embarrasses. She frequently has prior claim on the Love Interest. Her change of heart toward the heroine is a staple of the genre. (Isabelle/Rosalie)

So basically, Clare took the cast of Twilight, put them in the world of Harry Potter, and then wrote them a plot. I do plan on analyzing the rest of the book in further detail, but I will wait and do so another day. For now, I will end with my rant against fan fiction.

J.R.R. Tolkien spent 20 years world building for Lord of the Rings. He created the genre of adult fantasy. J.K. Rowling invented a world loved by millions of people. Then some hack comes along and has the arrogance to write his own plot with their world and characters. He stands on the shoulders of giants, benefiting from the connection other readers already feel toward existing characters and worlds. It's reaching into the brains of the creators and playing around with what's inside. It is theft and mutilation. 

It is also a handicap to the fan fiction writer himself. No good writer can learn from stealing other writer's works. Yes, read and learn from others, but then write for yourself. Otherwise, you will never know if what is loved about your work is what you wrote or what you stole. If you can't world build, then you have no business writing fantasy; and if you can't conceive of your own character, then you have no business writing at all.

Suffice it to say that Clare's early career as a writer of fan fiction seems to have hampered her ability to create something unique.

Husband of the Year

Here is a list I have been compiling of nice things Kevin has done for me recently.

He got up and refilled my glass of water when I noticed it was out, just so I wouldn't have to move from the couch.

He watched Lady and the Tramp with me.

He gave me his last piece of cake (not that I am hinting for the last piece that is sitting in there now.)

He bought me flowers when I told him I was having a bad day.

He gives back rubs.

He offered foot rubs (albeit with a look of trepidation).

He picks up food when I am tired or craving something.

When I was sick, he was very kind in taking care of me, even offering to go to the store after midnight to buy me the only cold medicine I am allowed to take.

He tells me that I am not following any of the negative pregnancy stereotypes, despite the fact that I have eaten more chocolate in the last six months than in all the rest of my years possibly combined.

He ate the noodles I undercooked.

He went dancing with me for our anniversary.

He backed up my computer after I went to bed, because I had gotten the blue screen of death that day.

And about a month ago, we had this conversation:
Audrey: I was going to ask you something, but I forgot my question.
Kevin: The answer is 'yes'. Yes, I love you more today than on the day I married you.

Certain Kinds of Magic

In December, when I began training my replacement at the Co-op, I felt certain she would be a bad fit. Finally, Kevin and I talked it over and agreed that I should offer to come back after my Christmas vacation and work as a temp to train someone else. The pay rate for temps is half of what I was making hourly. I made the offer. I received a counter offer. I was offered my regular pay plus a thousand dollar bonus to come back and train someone else. I accepted the offer.

I am convinced that this blessing poured out from those windows the Lord promised to leave open. I also felt that this money was to help with easing the strain other charitable donations had put on us. We had been called upon to give, and we gave. Then the Lord gave back.

Just as I was finishing up at work, I got an email about another good place where my money could go. And I knew, knew, that the extra money from my bonus was meant for this. Kevin and I juggled some numbers and found ourselves able to give, again.

That's when I found the piano.

I have always wanted a piano. Always wanted, but kind of always knew that I'd never be able to afford it or to justify the expense for a beginner. But in my head floated golden evenings with Jocilyn playing hymns or Tarythe playing Broadway musicals, while the rest of us stood around them and sang. I craved a piano like I craved that golden light of memory. But it was never going to happen.

Shelly told me about a piano adoption website, and on the day that I decided to sign away the last of my bonus, I found a piano for free in Austin. Now, it's not really for free, as I have to pay moving costs and tuning, but it is cheaper than any alternative I could imagine.

And today, that piano is sitting in my dining room. It's not fancy, it's not new, but it's mine.

And I know, the way Harry knew that Ron had to be the one to stab the Horcrux, that this was a gift for obeying the Lord and for giving what I had to give. As King Benjamin taught, when we keep the commandments of the Lord, he does immediately bless us.

I have come to understand something of certain kinds of magic.

Busy

I've been busy. Very busy. And what's more, I don't have Internet at home yet. So I haven't posted. And I have been incredibly lax on sending pictures of the house. But they're coming. Just as soon as I clean up my mess heaped in the living room, then you can see what Kevin and I have done so far. You'll have to ignore the fact that two of the three curtain panels were not ironed before they were hung up (item #74 on my to-do list). Bedroom pictures will follow after I hang curtains, pictures and the giant mirror.

I currently have enough projects lined up to keep me busy until I die. Assuming I die at age 148. I won't tell you how many hours I spent trying to find curtains for the bedroom before deciding to make them out of sheets. You'd be ashamed. You'd think, is this the same Audrey that preaches anti-materialism? Yes, you have a fair point, but please remember that in the end, I am making them out of sheets. Cheap ones. I am going to join the craft club at my community center, so I can socialize and be productive. Luckily, I also have friends who are willing to hang out and watch me pick stitches on pillow cases. I don't have to be entertaining to maintain relationships.

And speaking of entertaining, we meant to have a house-warming party, but at the rate we're going in getting rid of clutter, it seems Kevin's birthday bash will be the party's raison d'etre. Said extravaganza will have to take place this month, as Kevin will be gone for work from early October to early November and again from mid November to mid December. That's right, I will be without husband for two months this fall. Possibly this is when I will get my many projects done.

Kevin also has had his fair share of projects. Our yard looks beautiful, thanks to his weeding and mowing efforts in the face of hostile fire ant attacks. He anchored our beautiful new bookshelves to the wall (we do plan to have children climbing them eventually), and he plans to install our garage door opener. While I have proven myself very good at handing him tools while he's on the ladder, I think he plans to invite male friends along, so he too can socialize without being entertaining. It's a universal right that I can't deny him.

Some things that have been ignored but will soon be taking my time include writing--every Wednesday evening--and applying for Graduate School. Kevin (the most supportive wonderful husband I've ever had!) has agreed that I should not be stuck at the Co-op, that I need a chance to try my hand at writing, and that seeking a master's degree in sociology is a worthy growth opportunity. So, while I will stick it out in my current position until the end of my verbal contract, wheels are turning and plans are in the works for post-resignation pursuits.

Job Panic

I have been experiencing some serious job panic for the last week.

Kris quit. She has been the VP of Merchandising for eight years now. I have reported to her, either directly or indirectly, my entire 3.75 years at the company. I have liked her and been afraid of her by turns. I have always respected her. When she left, I surprised myself by crying like a little girl. I miss her, as a person, and definitely as a leader in the company. The entire store came to a screeching halt when Kris walked out the door.

The only person who doesn't seem to think that her departure has doomed our company is Mr. Mitchell, the president, whose bad decisions and sexist attitude caused Kris's departure.

When she left, I began to panic. What is this place without Kris? She carried it. She did two people's jobs. She was the buffer between the narcissistic president and the rest of the store. She was the buffer between our offices and the incompetence of Russell Athletic. She fielded the nonsense that the rest of us just complained about. Now that buffer is gone.

I immediately began to apply for any job on Craigslist that would accept me without my name on my shirt. I haven't decided that I want to leave my company, and it wasn't as though any of those positions screamed my name. But I panicked. I needed to know that I had a life boat should this ship start to sink.

I learned some things. I have a good resume if I want an administrative assistant position. I have had three call backs for interviews. I also have a good resume to become a retail buyer. I have three years' experience in buying, and I worked for Kris, whose name means something in these circles. Alas that Austin is not a retail center. I could have a great job in Houston or Dallas, but in Austin I am left with options as a purchasing agent for construction companies, and that's not where I want to go.

I guess the biggest problem is that I don't want any of these jobs. I have no ambitions to work as a secretary or a supply purchaser. I also don't want to stay here, not forever. The Co-op was never the long term plan. It is a place holder, a way to pay bills until I begin my career. When I left school, I was either going to marry Kevin and become a full-time mother, or I was going to grad school to become a teacher so I could write in the summers. I work here until one of those happens.

But I don't know if I can keep working here. It is a good job. But just in the last two days, I have had enough ridiculousness from both Mr. Mitchell and Russell Athletic that I don't know how long it will remain a good job. And if it becomes a bad job, I don't want to replace it with another filler position, I want to start working on my plans. I want--in order of desire--to be a mother, to write, to go to graduate school, to teach.

The hitch is that motherhood is terribly unpredictable and not in my power. I may get a call back tomorrow or never. I don't know if I have the time to finish gradutate school, let alone recoup the investment. The same goes for teacher training. What I would love to do, if it were just me, is quit my job and write. I want to be a writer. That is my dream. But it's not just me. I have a husband and a house, and it wouldn't be fair for me to stay home and play all day.

And I guess that leaves the Co-op. So I really hope that it does not fall apart around here.

Painting Party

Our House is Done

Door

We have our closing date on our house! July 28th. We get to do the official walk-through on the 21st.

The builders also let us know that they accidentally painted our front door the same color as our shutters, while it was supposed to be the same color as the siding. After I saw the picture, I asked them not to correct the error. I really like the dark door.

Ugly

I chopped my hair off for several reasons. Mostly, I never had or took the time to style my long hair. It took too long to wash, to condition, to dry and to curl. And usually the curl went flat. So I wore it in a low ponytail every day. I felt frumpy. So I chopped it.

I loved my new hair cut. LOVED. It was everything I dreamed. Wash and wear. It had a grown-up nerdy look to it that suited me perfectly. Plus, I got rid of all the hair I had previously dyed, so I was back to my natural dark color. When I wanted to style it, I could. I used a curling iron 1" in diameter and I did ringlets away from my face. Then I combed through with my fingers for some really stylin' hair. For two whole weeks I enjoyed my hair.

And then I got greedy. What if I could do that every day? What if I could put in permanent spiral curls, and just wash and wear that? I had a consultation at a salon. I explained everything. I used the exact measurement of curl I was looking for. Perhaps these people just didn't know what the word "diameter" means. And I'm sure they weren't ready for the "vertical" concept. I have natural curl in my hair, large loose curls, but it's inconsistent. I just wanted to make it uniform. They warned me that with my hair as short as it is, I would likely not have curl but wave. And it might not last you very long, maybe only two months. Perfect, I said, body wave was just fine with me. And since this was an experiment, I really wasn't looking for a six-month unalterable style. If it didn't take, that was fine by me.

Oh merciful heavens. The rods they used were about half an inch in diameter, max. And they placed them horizontally over my whole head. And on the bottom part of my hair, where it was shorter, they used smaller and smaller rods. Now the hair that grows off my neck, which used to curl into lovely ringlets all on its own, is in small clumps of hair stuck against my skin. As Heather said, I asked for wave and I got Annie.

I tried washing it out. They warn you not to shampoo or condition your hair for 3 and 7 days, respectively, for fear that your curl will relax too much. It doesn't. I tried. Thrice. They also tell you the curl gets looser over the first couple of days. And that is true. But it doesn't make the curls go from a tighter curl to a looser one. It simply makes the hair pull straighter. Now it's not tiny ringlets on my head that reach only to my ears; my hair reaches my chin again and looks like it has been put through a crimper. And it forms the shape of a mushroom, thanks to those smaller curls in my shorter layers.

I have never felt so ugly. I sobbed for hours. I confess to praying in the shower for a miracle that would fix my hair. I didn't mind the lost money, but the hair just hurt. I avoid looking in mirrors, and I have gotten Kevin's promise not to take pictures of me on our trip next week. "What if you look really cute?" he asked. I won't. That won't be a problem.

I can't wear hats, I can't blow-dry my hair straight. I can only plaster it down with conditioner, moisturizing cream and mousse. It's almost not too terrible that way, just wet looking. No worse than the low ponytail, maybe. I might be able to get used to it. I'll just go back to being frumpy all day. Who knows, maybe bobby pins or curling irons will have some effect. It's not the worst thing to happen to a person, but it is the worst thing to happen to my hair.

House Goes Postal and Shutters

We hadn't visited our house in two weeks and we found many changes. The most apparent update is the driveway. But wait! As cool as it is, there are even better surprises to come.

I think the shutters around the foyer window make a nice addition. You can also see our house number -1805- under the very handsome carriage light.

The rubble has been cleared away, and all the little holes and outlets from the house have been covered appropriately.

A post holer. You dig holes. For posts.
Also, as you can see, besides the really fancy fence posts, we have a back patio and a flood light to blind our voyeuristic neighbors.

To get ready for putting in the lawn, they scraped off all that sand and shale topsoil to reveal the special Texas clay underneath. And that's why the garden will be above ground in planters.

Of course, where that garden will go is to be determined, again. See, we were told that the fence would come at least half way up the house. Possibly further. And yet, you can see where the posts stop flush with the back wall.

Not only does the fence-less side yard mean no garden there, it also necessitates some sort of large bush right in front of the master bathroom there. Maybe hydrangeas. Also of interest to us, though maybe not to you, we have an a/c unit.

And on the inside, we have tile!

And a hideous chandelier. I will be replacing this light fixture, thanks in large part to Do-It-Yourself videos from Home Depot.

There are also doorknobs. And the trim, walls and doors have been painted.

Counters. And a sink. And a faucet. And tile back splash. The kitchen is just beautiful.

The black granite counter top is just full of colors, mostly grays and blues. It's lovely.

Here you can see the recessed lighting up above.

Our fireplace, too, has come a long way. It makes me so happy to see it. Kevin says for that reason, it makes him happy too. He's nice.

Our powder bath complete with pedestal sink and oval mirror.

Now, see, I like this chandelier. Good thing too, because as I noted before, this one is out of my reach to replace.

Upstairs bath with tile and marble counter top.

Master bathroom. The sinks are in. I do not love the square sinks, but Kevin does. And for that reason, I tolerate them. I'm not as nice as he is.
We will be replacing the faucets in the bathrooms in favor of higher arched ones. The better to wash my hair in the sink, my dear.

Shelves in the closet. Happy thought indeed.

I am so happy with the tile we chose. It goes so well with the cabinets, and it looks nice on the walls too. Here it is around the garden tub.
And, if this window is going to face the public, at least it is clouded.

And inside the shower, too. Also nice are the plumbing fixtures.

Unrequited Love

I accidentally fell in love with a dress that I can't afford. As Heather pointed out to me, it is a good thing I didn't try it on. Though, maybe if I had, I would see that it didn't fit right, and I could get over this crazy crush. Instead, I will live my whole life pining for the dress that got away.

Hair Chopped

I got my haircut last Saturday. Twice. The first time, my hair seemed the right length until it dried. When I saw pictures of it from our trip out to the house, I realized that I really didn't like the shape of it. The long layers hung down along my neck, and I felt like Mrs. Brady. So I went and got a second cut. And I've altered some of it on my own. This picture is terribly fuzzy, as it was taken on my phone, but it gives you the idea.

The Trim and Cabinet Edition

Our house is fully bricked. And the siding and trim have been painted. The neutral looks far better with the brick than the yellow did.

Ignore the privy.

The pictures of the back do a better job of showing the contrast between the siding and the trim. You can see it just under the roof and around the windows.

Ta da! Cabinets! You'll be sick of all the cabinet pictures before the end, but I was terrible excited by them.

Those are my hands doing the excited gesture from Wallace and Gromit.

Giant pantry. Complete with door. The doors have gone in all over the house. As have all shelves.

The cabinets have also gone into the bathrooms.

The stairs have a hand rail.

Second bath...with cabinets.

The bay window I love.

Here you can see the door frames, doors and baseboards that all went in this week. Also, all corners have been rounded,

Check out the ceiling above the bay window. Neat.